So one of my best friends and I are both writing books. It’s amazing how two people who have known each other over twenty years discover their dreams at the same time. I am horribly proud of her and I am grateful to be going through this whole process with someone. While Jen is writing wonderfully poetic and adorable children’s stories. I am embroiled into the paranormal world of witches, vampires, and fairies. She is brainstorming on creating a fantastical world for young minds, I am pondering if I threw in too many F-bombs in book one and am brushing up on some erotic mommy porn for book two.
Apples and oranges, right? They may be different but in the end their fruit.
I received an email last night. An S.O.S. for help. Please assist me in writing my authors bio. Since I was just writing down some thoughts of my own for mine I thought no problem.
Here’s the thing, how in the hell do I write about myself, in the third person, with just a few small, attention grabbing paragraphs?
I came up with this:
Shannon Barczak lives in the great state of Maine with her husband,three children and overly friendly dog named Ruby.
When she is not staying up late dreaming of crazy plots she enjoys cooking, baking and dabbling in painting.
Visit her website at www. shannonbarczakbooks.com day or night and see what she is up too.
What I really want to write is:
Shannon Barczak lives in her home state of Maine with her husband, who is like her fourth child, 14 year old hormone fueled twin boys, a 7 year old daughter who thinks she is truly a princess, and a dog named Ruby who is so inappropriately friendly it’s almost embarrassing.
When she is not cooking, baking, doing endless loads of laundry, and cleaning she enjoys dreaming up crazy stories all while listening to her iPOD on the highest decibel level possible. Her other hobbies include painting completely insane abstract paintings that most people don’t understand, swearing like a sailor when her children aren’t around ( ok, sometimes they are) and reading several books at the same time.
I’m thinking of going with number two because that is what’s real. I am not starting this journey on falsehoods and phoniness.
If some snotty big time publisher or literary agent scoffs at the bio, then get the f*ck over it and move on.
I’m just not that kind of girl.